December 31, 2019
If you are thinking about filing for divorce, or you’re already going through one, you may be concerned about the weight of the proceedings and how that weight will slow you down in the years to come. Divorce is a big decision, whether it’s for the best or not, and even if your life without your spouse is better, you may find yourself hanging on to some of the feelings you felt when you were together for longer than you anticipated.
Here are 4 tips that you can use to help move on to the next chapter of your life after divorce.
Focus on Forgiveness and the Future
There is often a lot of anger that comes with divorce. You may be angry with your partner, with your friends, or even with yourself. “How did I let this happen?”, you may think. There are likely hundreds of questions swirling around your head, but rather than beating yourself up or even stewing with rage for your former partner, spend some time with the spirit of forgiveness.
Allow yourself to mourn the losses you have suffered and give yourself the space to heal. We can’t always anticipate what life is going to throw at us, no matter how clever or well-prepared we are. So, give yourself a break and don’t dwell on your short-comings. Even if you’re not ready to forgive your former spouse for what they did to your home or to you, focus on the future.
Cultivate Your Support System
The very nature of divorce brings to mind what you are losing, whether it be just your spouse or more than that. Rather than only placing the focus on what you’re losing, take some time with all of the amazing things in your life that you do have. You may have wonderful friends, amazing kids, a rewarding career, or fulfilling hobbies.
Most importantly, however, you have yourself at the center of your support structure. Seeking support from friends and loved ones is essential when going through hard times, so make sure to reach out to those that care about you and remember that you are incredibly resilient.
Recognize Your Capacity to Grow
No one is ever fully defined by one aspect of their life, and that includes you. You have the power to keep growing, learning, and thriving, even if it doesn’t feel that way today. As it is with all emotional wounds, you will have good days and bad days.
You will likely have places you want to avoid because they remind you of your ex. You may find activities that you used to enjoy are now painful. It won’t always be this way. Take your time, let yourself hurt, and remember that you have the capacity for amazing things.
Work with a Compassionate Divorce Lawyer in Owings Mills
If you’re considering divorce for your future, then work with a lawyer who understands the process from all angles. The Law Offices of Alan L. Billian P.A. are here to help you through your divorce settlement with compassion and expertise, so contact us today to learn more about how we can help you.